


Broken Hearts

by Ice_Milk



Category: Free!, Haikyuu!!
Genre: Angst with a Happy Ending, Background Relationships, Crossover, Heartbreak, M/M, Mpreg, Not Beta Read
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-12-26
Updated: 2019-02-17
Packaged: 2019-09-28 03:22:12
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 9
Words: 21,280
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17174897
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ice_Milk/pseuds/Ice_Milk
Summary: What happens when Tsukishima wakes to find Yamaguchi has run off in the night leaving only a vague note behind.





	1. The note

**Author's Note:**

> For the life of me I cant think of a name. Please help!

Life had been over all good, Yamaguchi Tadashi grew up a carefree kid with parents who loved and supported him in all that he wanted to do. During middle school Yamaguchi was bullied a short time but he never looked back on it as something be wished didn’t happen because it was the cause of him meeting Tsukishima Kei.

Tsukishima Kei was a loner, the fact that he was way taller than those his age intimidated some but what kept most away was his salty personality. This never bothered Tsukishima though, he rather liked the peace and quiet and the freedom to come and go not having to deal with troublesome people.

However tall and salty Tsukishima was didn’t bother Yamaguchi at all, the day Tsukishima unintentionally stopped his bullies he decided he wanted to be friends with him. That’s how it was too, Yamaguchi and Tsukishima became best friends and it continued to be the two of them against all others until their first year at Karasuno.

At first it seemed as though nothing had changed but slowly they became bonded with the schools Volleyball team. Becoming friends with various people on the team made Yamaguchi care about all of his team but he cared differently for Tsukishima, Yamaguchi realized that he was in love with his best friend.

Once he realized this all he could do was hide those feelings, after all what normal boy is happy to hear his boy best friend is in love with them? Everything was going perfectly until one day after school during their 2nd year Tsukishima got a confession from a cute girl in Yamaguchi’s class.

Of course the confession took place outside the gym and while Yamaguchi was inside suppose to be practicing his serve. Before even realizing it Yamaguchi had tip toed over and was ease dropping despite the fact he knew he shouldn’t.

Tsukishima didn’t just flat out reject the girl, he told her he was already so in love with someone else he couldn’t even give a thought to be with any one else. Yamaguchi felt like his world had just shattered, he knew his chances of being with first love were non-existent but he had no idea Tsukishima was in love with someone else.

The idea of Tsukishima being with someone else was too much for Yamaguchi to process so he distanced himself from his best friend. And he did, he successfully avoided Tsukishima all of the break before entering their 3rd year.

After being apart the whole break you could say the relationship between Yamaguchi and Tsukishima was awkward but as time went by things started to get back to normal. They were anyway until one afternoon Yamaguchi was having lunch with a teammate, Hinata Shouyou, who he had gotten fairly close to over the last 2 ½ years.

Hinata was complaining about how the girl he liked in his class was always going on and on about Kageyama, another teammate of theirs. Hinata hated that all the girls liked Kageyama because he was tall and stoic looking and Hinata was still small and boyish looking despite being in his 3rd year.

Hinata asked Yamaguchi if he ever has to deal with this and without a thought he answered honestly and said he wasn’t interested in girls, Hinata seemed fine with his answer. What they didn’t know was that there were some 3rd year basketball players that overheard them.

3rd year Yamaguchi Tadashi of the volleyball club is gay was the talk of the whole school the next day and at first Yamaguchi was worried his teammates and maybe even Tsukishima would begin to avoid him but they all welcomed him with open arms. However his teammates seemed to be the only ones at school who accepted him, it was like traveling back in time dealing with bullies.

The bullies were worse than when he was younger but he didn’t have to suffer through any of it for long or alone like before. This time around he had his teammates and more importantly Tsukishima to help him keep standing and not let the bullies win in tearing him down.

Towards the end of the year things were mostly back to normal, his teammates had helped him stand up enough that the bullies eventually got bored when there was little to no reaction from him. Yamaguchi was also pretty sure Tsukishima and a few of his other teammates fought some of them off, often noticing their bruised knuckles but no one ever said anything.

It was then that Yamaguchi received his first confession, it was a first year boy, he was shorter than himself with medium length light brown hair that seemed to stick up in every direction. The boy was shy and blushed to his ears looking down while he confessed, no matter how you looked at him he was adorable.

Since word got around Tsukishima accepted that he was gay sure but he didn’t act interested and why would he, Tsukishima was straight. So ultimately realizing he had no chance to be with his first love Yamaguchi accepted the confession, maybe he could learn to love this boy.

Yamaguchi had taken his relationship very seriously and spent every chance he had with his boyfriend, they never made it passed holding hands but the relationship itself only lasted a few weeks. Getting dumped didn’t upset him, apparently the now ex used him to see if he could make his straight friend jealous and succeeded, he was surprised that his now ex he told to confess his own feelings too before it was too late.

Not needing to rush off to see his now ex off Yamaguchi went straight to practice, making it there before anyone else giving him some time to think, had he really been that transparent with his feelings? Everyone was shocked when they showed up and saw that Yamaguchi was already changed and doing warm up stretches, he explained that he had been dumped and the reason behind it all.

This angered the team but no one more than Tsukishima, letting his emotions run free, threatening the boy as he punched the wall only to then pull Yamaguchi into a hug confessing that he would never hurt Yamaguchi if he were his. Realizing what he had said Tsukishima pulled away visibly flustered looking at the ground as everyone else silently cleared the gym to give them a few moments alone.

Minutes passed and Yamaguchi could no longer handle the deafening silence, walking up to Tsukishima saying that he didn’t care about the boy because he was just as guilty using the boy to try and move on from his first love. Tsukishima gave him a puzzled look and that’s when Yamaguchi snapped and yelled out “I love you Kei!” as he flung himself into the other pulling him down by the shirt and crashing their lips together.

Things went smoothly for them after that, their parents, siblings and teammates all accepting them which was all that really mattered to them.

They graduated and moved on to the next steps in their lives, Tadashi took a job at his grandparents flower shop and Kei went on to college. They stuck together and eventually made a life together, Kei graduated early and got a job at a museum and Tadashi inherited the flower shop when his grandmother died.  
Their life together had been good until now.

Current day, 4AM Monday morning Tadashi carefully set down his bags at the front and then made his way back to the bedroom, he placed a note under Kei’s glasses on the night stand and slowly crept out of the room. On his way back to the front door he grabbed a few more things, one being Kei’s favorite hoody from the chair in his office and then half of their framed photos before walking out the door for the last time at 4:30AM.

When Kei woke later that morning he didn’t find it alarming that he was alone in bed, Tadashi has been getting up before him for the last couple weeks. What he does find out of the ordinary is a small folded paper under his glasses on the night stand.

 _Kei,_  
_I just can’t please forgive me._  
_I love you and always will but don’t look for me._  
_Promise you will continue to live well._  
_I’m sorry._  
_Tadashi._

Hoping it’s some kind of sick joke Kei bolts up out of bed and runs through their apartment, Tadashi is nowhere in sight and he’s noticed some of their things are missing. Quickly returning to the bedroom he grabs his phone and dials Tadashi’s number but is greeted with a voice message saying that the phone has been turned off. Unable to process what’s happened Kei drops the phone and sinks down to the floor.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tsukishima reaches out and Yamaguchi travels far away

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Decided to upload ch 2 right away since ch 1 is mostly background info

“Hello?”

“Nii-chan..” Kei manages to force this response easily enough, still sounding like his usual monotone self.

“Good morning Kei. You never call this early, not that I’m complaining. What’s up?”

Silence.

“Kei you still there?”

Silence once more, Kei’s mind is completely blank at this point.

“Is something wrong?”

This question breaks the spell and Kei cries out loudly finally letting the tears fall. _Of course something is wrong! Tadashi left me! He’s gone, I have no idea why he left or where he’s gone to! He’s just gone!_ He mentally yells these thoughts but the only things capable of coming out of his mouth are sobs as he drops his phone.

“Kei?! Kei you’re home right? I’m on my way! Just stay there, I’ll be there as soon as I can.”

Akiteru hangs up but Kei is such a mess that he’s already forgotten he called his brother. He’s scrunched himself into a small ball, burying his face in his knees hoping that this is all just a bad dream and when he wakes up Tadashi will be making breakfast in the kitchen like always.

Half hour later and the doorbell goes off but Kei doesn’t seem to register the sound, still curled into himself on the floor clutching Tadashi’s note. The door clicks open and he can suddenly hear footsteps outside the door. Immediately thinking Tadashi must have come back he jumps to his feet, after all there’s no way his Tadashi would leave like this.

“Kei?! This is where you were!”

 _It’s not Tadashi, he really left me._ Kei crumbles back down to the floor at the sight of his brother enter his bedroom.

“Kei!” Akiteru rushes to his little brother’s side. “What happened? Are you ill? Where’s Tadashi?”

Not wanting to directly look up at his big brother and not trusting his voice Kei pushes the note out for Akiteru. I must look so pathetic right now. Kei can hear the note being carefully unfolded and squeezes his eyes shut as a gasp escapes the others mouth.

Arms suddenly fling around him and even though he hates showing others his weak side Kei can’t help but lean into his big Brothers touch and cry some more.

“Kei what do you need right now, what can I do for you?”

Kei thinks, “Work. I.. not today please.. call them.” He manages to force out the words.

Akiteru nods and rubs Kei’s back lightly. “What should I tell them?”

“Th-the truth, they.. they all know.” Kei coughs to clear his throat, pulling out of his big Brothers embrace he slides himself up onto the bed and turns away to hide himself. “I’ll be taking the week off, they can reach me by email if needed.” His words flow much more smoothly now that he’s calmed down a little.

“I’ll be right back then, I’m just going to step out into the kitchen to make some calls, your work, my work and home. I won’t tell Mom till you’re ready though, do you need anything else while I’m out?”

“Asprin.. please, and Nii-Chan?”

“Yes?”

“Tell Mom.. just don’t.. want her here today, I’ll visit her soon.”

“As long as you’re sure.”

Reaching the kitchen Akiteru sighs as he runs his fingers through his hair. This was definitely the last thing he was suspecting when getting the call from Kei. Looking at the time he decides to call his own work first seeing as he needed to be in sooner than Kei did.

“ Good morning this is Tsukishima Akiteru… yes… no I’m calling because I won’t be able to make it in today, maybe not the next few days… yes, there’s been a family emergency… thank you, goodbye.”

Hanging up he looks through his contacts for the museums number.

“Good morning this is Tsukishima Akiteru, Tsukishima Kei’s older brother.”

“What a surprise Tsukishima-San, you might not remember me but I’m Ennoshita Chikara, I was one year your brothers senpai in volleyball.”

“Yes of course I remember you, Ennoshita-Kun, I hope you’ve been well.”

“I have since your brother got me this job last year, I really owe him. Speaking of your brother he hasn’t come in yet this morning, it’s unusual for him to not be here already.”

 _Damn Kei how early do you go in, doesn’t your day officially start around 9?!_ “Actually I’m calling on his behalf, he told me to say that he’ll be taking some time off, a week to be exact, and if there’s any problems he can be reached by email.”

“Is he ill?”

“No he’s not sick, um well he said it was okay to tell you but ah, well Tadashi left him..”

“….Oh wow, that’s awful. Please tell him to take all the time he needs, I’ll keep everything in order and be in touch via email so he’s still in the loop.”

“I will be here taking care of things here while he gets back on his feet but it’s a relief to know he has someone he can depend on to help with his work. Thank you Ennoshita-Kun. Please have a good rest of the day.”

“You as well Tsukishima-San, goodbye.”

Now here comes the difficult part, he said to tell her but will she really not barge in here? Letting out a long sigh Akiteru sits down at the table and presses the dial button.

One ring.. two rings..

“Good morning, Tsukishima residence.”

“Hey Mom, it’s Akiteru.”

“Aki shouldn’t you be on your way to work?”

“I’ve called out for the next few days.”

“Oh? Are you and Saeko celebrating something? Maybe you’re calling because I’m finally going to be a Gramma?”

“I’m calling from Kei’s place.”

“So no grandchildren then?”

“Not yet sorry.”

“Is everything okay over at Kei’s, if he’s sick Tadashi should be more than capable of handling it, unless they’re both sick, do you need my help? I can be there in twenty.”

 _She sounds worried already, man this is not going to be easy._ “Listen Mom, I need you to listen all the way through what I’m saying before you do anything, or I’ll hang up and you’ll know nothing.”

“Oh Akiteru just say what you need, don’t be so dramatic.”

“No Mom, promise right now.”

There’s a serious moment of silence in the conversation.

“Okay I promise, now tell me what’s going on?”

“Kei called me early this morning and just started crying. He was unable to say anything at the time, I came straight away cause we all know Kei doesn’t cry for no reason. When I got here no one answered so I let myself in, things were quiet and the place was a mess…”

“Akiteru where’s Kei?” She’s worried so she’s interrupting.

“I found Kei curled up on his bedroom floor and when I asked him what was wrong he handed me some crumpled paper..” Akiteru takes a deep breath. “It was a note from Tadashi, Mom he left him. From what I can see he took some stuff while Kei was asleep and left a note saying he still loved him but not to look for him.”

“Akiteru this is a very bad joke, Kei and Tadashi have a wonderful relationship, very open and loving, there’s no way Tadashi would leave like that. We just had them over for dinner a few weeks ago and everything was fine between them. Now tell me what’s really going on.”

“Well it happened Mom, I’m out in the kitchen right now and I can see Tadashi’s half of the dishes are gone, he has no shoes by the door and half of their photos are gone. I haven’t looked in the closet yet but I’m betting most of if not all of his things are gone from there too.”

“There’s just no way! Akiteru tell me it’s some horrible sick joke you boys are all doing?”

“I have to go Mom, Kei needs me. He asked me to tell you but he doesn’t want to face you today.”

“Of course I’m coming right now! He’s my baby and he’s hurting!”

“No Mom, I don’t think that’s a good idea, you know how Kei is about people seeing him weak, we’re lucky he even called me. He said he would see you soon, so respect that he had me call you and tell you right away because he could have waited. If you want to help him you should call Tadashi’s Mom and see if she knows where he is? Even if he doesn’t come back Kei deserves a better explanation for why he left other than he “just can’t”, whatever that means.”

“Are you sure you don’t need me today?”

“Yes Mom, I’m sure if you did come it would make things a lot more difficult for Kei to let his feelings out. So just make some calls please, for Kei.”

“Okay Aki, I love you both, please take care of Kei. “

“Always, that goes without saying. Goodbye Mom.”

“Goodbye Aki.”

After hanging up Akiteru let’s out a long sigh and sends a text to his wife.

‘Hello dear, I called out of work for the next few days, Kei needs me. Tadashi left him only leaving a note for him to find when he woke up.’

He sends a second text immediately after.

‘Can you discretely ask around Ryunosuke and their friends if Tadashi has said anything to any of them? I’m not sure I’ll be home tonight, I’ll let you know later’

One more message.

‘I love you.’

Putting the phone down Akiteru heads to the bathroom to look for the asprin, then returns to the kitchen for a glass of water. The phone dings, it’s Saeko.

‘Consider it done, take care of Kei, I love you too baby.’

Finally tucking through phone into his pocket Akiteru heads back to the bedroom.

“Sorry Kei, you know how Mom likes to talk, but she promised not to come to..” Kei has fallen asleep hugging Tadashi’s pillow, eyes all red and swollen. _Damn you Tadashi, you better have a damn good reason for putting my brother through this._

Akiteru leaves the water and asprin on the bedside table and removes Kei’s glasses before peaking in the closet really quick. It’s just as he thought most of Tadashi’s things are gone.

 

* * *

 

Leaving Kei had been the most difficult and painful decision that Tadashi has ever had to make. Never in his life has he cried more than while loading his things into his car.

His destination was 3 ½ hours away by car or it should have been but with all the crying Tadashi had to pull over multiple times to calm down in fear of getting into an accident, making the trip take almost 4 ½ hours instead.

Once arriving in the small town Tadashi went straight to the Drs. Office to check in and pick up what he needed.  
_I made the right decision for us, even if I feel like I’m dying this won’t actually kill me, I hope. Now breathe Tadashi, you can do this, walk in there and start your new life!_

It’s now almost 9, taking a deep breath Tadashi pushes himself to exit his car and make his way inside the small building and to the front desk where a small blonde boy sits.

“Good morning how can I help you?” The receptionist smiles brightly.

“G..good morning. I’m here to meet Dr. Ryugazaki, I had some difficulties getting here so I’m a little late, I hope that’s not a problem.”

The receptionists smile widens going from professional to over excited. “You must be Yamaguchi-San! Rei-Chan mentioned you might be coming in late. So have a seat and I’ll let him know you’ve made it.”

“Ah, thank you.”

After sitting down Tadashi let’s out a breath of relief but is only able to relax for a minute before he doors to the back open up and a relatively tall man with red rimmed glasses walks through the door.

“Yamaguchi Tadashi?”

He must be Dr. Ryugazaki. Tadashi stands, making eye contact.

“Yes that’s me.”

“Of course that’s him Rei-Chan, you cleared your whole day for him and no one else is here.”

“Nagisa! How many times do I have to tell you to stop referring to me as Rei-Chan while we’re in the office? It’s unprofessional.”

“You’re such a stiff Rei-Chan, Yamaguchi-Kun here doesn’t mind, we’re a small office in the middle of nowhere pretty much.” The short man named Nagisa turns to Tadashi quickly. “Besides I can just tell we’re going to get along great, right Yamaguchi-Kun?”

 _I went from San to Kun in a matter of minutes, what an interested person._ The smile he gives Tadashi is almost blinding and he can’t help but give an honest smile and small laugh in return.

“Y..yeah I’m sure we’ll be friends in no time, um..?”

“Oh! Call me Nagisa! I’m the receptionist here but I’m also this guy’s partner!”

“Nagisa! Please don’t just blab about everything like that the moment you meet someone.”

Tadashi can’t help but laugh even more.

“Thank you, Nagisa. I was having a rather bad morning but you somehow just managed to make me laugh even though I was sure I wouldn’t be doing that anytime soon.”

Both Nagisa and Dr. Ryugazaki eyes widen at the sight of Tadashi’s genuine smile before them.

“Ne Yamaguchi-Kun let’s exchange numbers and be friends? You just moved here right, I can show you around and introduce you to people if you like.”

“Sure that’d be fun.”

“Alright Nagisa you can chat him up all you want after I’m done with him but I’d like to move on if you’re done.”

“Of course Rei-Chan! Before I forget, will we be eating lunch together today or will you be with Yamaguchi-Kun for longer?”

“Geez Nagisa! I don’t know I’ll probably be busy but I’ll message you okay so please just go answer the phones or something. I need to get back to work.”

Nagisa stands on his tip toes and kisses his partner on the cheek. “Right away sir!” He winks and then skips back to sit at his desk, leaving behind a blushing man.

_They’re so cute._

The man now turning and smiling. “I am so sorry about all of that, you’re new so he’s extra excited, he’s not usually that bad. Anyway it’s a pleasure to meet you, come on back and we’ll chat in the exam room.”


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Yamaguchi has his first appointment.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I couldn't help adding another ch right away haha, sorry it's like twice as long as the others. Also I googled all the medical numbers because I'm not a Dr and I don't know what a good blood pressure is.

Walking down the hall to the exam room Tadashi feels like he’s going to be sick but almost instantly relaxes when the door is opened for him. The room is larger than he expected, the walls are a relaxing pale blue and over all the room gives off a spacious homey kind of feel. 

“We’re not a very big office but I take precedence in making our patients as comfortable as possible. Please have a seat anywhere and we’ll begin.” 

Tadashi nods and hums in agreement as he sits down in a comfortable arm chair next to where Dr. R is seated.   
“I’d like to formally welcome you, I’m Ryugazaki Rei, as you now know I also have a male partner, he’s a bit much sometimes but I still love him dearly. I wouldn’t normally state that to a patient the first time meeting them but I’d just like you to know that no one here will ever judge you for your sexuality.”

“Thank you very much.” Dr. Ryugazaki smiles softly and nods his head in return.

“Right into business then. Dr. Nakamura has filled me in on some of your unique situation, from what I understand is that things didn’t work out with your partner so you’ll be doing this alone and that’s why you opted to move so far suddenly?” 

“I..um, Kei and I were childhood friends since middle school and finally became lovers our 3rd year of high school. Kei went on to college and then got a job at a museum and I eventually took over my grandparents flower shop. Our family and friends accepted us easily and we’ve always been really honest and open with each other. So things have always been good for us.” 

_Come on Tadashi get yourself together._ Dr. Ryugazaki hands Tadashi the box of tissues as he starts to sniffle. 

“Take your time.” 

Tadashi nods. 

“One thing Kei always said was he was glad he ended up gay because he didn’t have to worry about having children. Even as a child himself he didn’t like other children, he’s always been stubborn like that. So when I found out that I, even though I’m a male, was pregnant I knew I had to choose between Kei and this baby...” 

Tears are steadily flowing down his cheeks but Tadashi knows it’s best to get it all out in the open now to help him feel better and hopefully avoid misunderstandings in the future.

“I love Kei more than I’ve ever loved some one but this baby is ours, part Kei and part me, this baby is a miracle that shouldn’t have been possible but happened, this baby even though Kei doesn’t like children was made because Kei and I love each other. So I just couldn’t abort this baby even though it meant I couldn’t be with Kei any more.” 

Dr. Ryugazaki moved over to sit next to Tadashi and began rubbing small circles on his upper back to try and comfort him.

“That must have been a very tough decision to make but you made it yourself so I won’t press anymore.” 

Tadashi can only slightly nod his head in response, his words have left him and suddenly he feels the urge to throw up once again. Only this time it’s not only a feeling, he really is about to throw up. 

Standing up and look around frantically Dr. Ryugazaki realizes what is going on and quickly pulls the trash can over and continues to rub Tadashi’s upper back as he dry heaves into the trash can. 

“Has the morning sickness been a problem you’ve been dealing with or is this just because of today’s events?”   
Tadashi coughs and accepts the tissues being held out to him so he can wipe his mouth of any spit or whatever left on his face. 

“Since the be..beginning, it has been getting worse though.” 

Tadashi sinks back down into his chair feeling both relief that it’s over and soreness in his upper chest from how often this has happened to him. 

Dr. Ryugazaki takes a few notes down on his clip board and types some things into his computer. “Would you like something to help you not feel so nauseous?” 

“Will it hurt the baby?”

“Not at all, morning sickness and nausea are very common in pregnancy so there are multiple different medicines that are safe for you and baby. In most cases the sickness goes away completely or subsides a little when you enter the second trimester.” 

“Second trimester?” 

“Did Dr. Nakamura not explain any of this to you yet?”

“He might have but honestly I’ve been too shocked to really listen. I just know he recommended you for privacy reasons and he said you were an expert in these kinds of things.” 

“I wouldn’t say expert but I was always interested in these unique kinds of cases when I was a student. You are my first male pregnancy patient so I won’t lie I am very excited to take a look inside you.” 

“L..loo..look insi..ide me?” 

“Ultrasound wise of course, I can’t risk just cutting you open and hurting you or your baby, I’m not that type of person.” Dr. Ryugazaki smiles genuinely. “Yamaguchi-San..” 

“Oh um just Yamaguchi is fine.” 

“Very well then, Yamaguchi, do you mind if I give you a look over and run some tests to see where we are in this whole pregnancy? I know my previous colleague Dr. Nakamura wasn’t really equipped for this but my office has everything here that I will need.” 

“What kind of tests? They won’t hurt the baby?” 

“Routine physical since this is my first time seeing you as a patient and then routine pregnancy tests. Just know that I will never subject you to any type of tests that would do harm to you or your baby.” 

“O..okay then. What’s first?” 

“Great!” Dr. Ryugazaki stands up going over to the cupboard and returns with a hospital gown. “I’ll step out so if you would strip down completely and put that on I will be back in a few minutes.” 

A quick nod from Tadashi and Dr. Ryugazaki is gone from the room. Stepping out from his clothes and into the gown Tadashi sits up on the exam table, absent mindedly rubbing his lower abdomen waiting. This is really happening, I wonder if I’ll be able to see you soon little one. 

A few more minutes pass by and there’s a knock on the door. “Yamaguchi are you all set?” 

“Yes I’m ready.” 

Dr. Ryugazaki re-enters the room with a smile that screams how excited he is but also that he will stay professional. 

“Very good. First I’ll start off with basic vitals; temperature, heart rate, blood pressure, O2 levels, height and weight, I’ll listen to your lungs and give the outside of your body a quick once over. Are you aware if you are up to date on your vaccines?” 

“Yes I’m up to date.” 

“Very good, I’m going to stick this on your finger to check your heart rate and O2 level while I check your temperature.” 

Tadashi nods while holding out his right hand. 

“Alright 37 C°, 97% O2 and 68 BPM all good. Next I’ll check your blood pressure.” 

Tadashi holds him arm out and let’s Dr. Ryugazaki wrap his upper arm with the cuff and slightly winces as it tightens on his arm. 

“117 over 78 very good. If you would please stand up and join me over there I’d like to get an accurate height and weight.” 

“Sure thing” 

“181.1 CM and what’s your usual weight do you know?”

“69.5 KG.” 

“Seems the morning sickness has taken in toll on you, you’re currently 64 KG, but don’t worry I’ll give you a prescription for something before you leave that should help you right a way.” Dr. Ryugazaki smiles seeming proud of the check up so far. 

Sitting back on the exam table Tadashi feels relieved that things are going well so far. Dr. Ryugazaki checks his eyes, ears and throat and everything checks out.

“I’m going to lower the top half of the gown to listen to your lungs more clearly and examine your chest and abdomen now.”

Nodding Tadashi allows Dr. Ryugazaki to unbutton the back of the gown and slip the top down so it pools around his waist. 

“Breathe in nice and deep for me.. and again.. and again..” he’s moving the stethoscope around on Tadashi’s back. “You have nice strong sounding lungs.” 

Dr. Ryugazaki moves to set his tools down on the counter and grabs a small sheet blanket. “If you would please drape this over your lower half and lay back so I can examine your chest and abdomen.” 

Tadashi does as he’s asked, feeling slightly awkward now. 

“Okay I’m just going to press around now and see how things feel, don’t worry I won’t press hard enough to hurt anything, I’m just looking to see if I can tell what’s what so I have a better idea of where to look later on with ultrasounds.”

Tadashi tenses under the first touch over his chest. Dr. Ryugazaki’s fingers dance over the top of his pectoral muscles, slightly gripping and pushing up underneath and then around his areolas. 

“Hm well these seem to be normal, I don’t feel any swollen or enlarged glands like I would if you had female breasts. So I guess the likely-ness of you producing milk is very little if at all but it might be too early to tell.” 

Tadashi mentally sighs with relief, although he’s accepted he’s having a baby even though he’s a male he doesn’t want to think of himself in a position where he would need to wear a bra. Dr. Ryugazaki gives Tadashi a gentle smile and he moves downwards, his hands are pushing more firmly around his abdomen. 

“I can feel your abdominal muscles quiet well like I expected to since you are fit but I’m pretty sure I am also feeling what should be your uterus right here below your belly button. It’s nice and firm and a good size, we should be able to do an ultrasound today and see baby if you’d like?” 

“Really? I’ll be able to see?” 

“After the exam is done on the outside I’ll need to do an ultrasound to check organ placement and so on inside but your uterus feels larger than I expected it to so that tells me we’ll most likely be able to see the fetus.” 

_I’ll get to see our baby!_

“This next part may be the most awkward part but I need to check your gentiles and the anus opening. So I’ll need you to scoot your bottom down towards the edge of the bed and..” He pauses and pulls out the stirrups “place your feet in here.” 

Doing as he’s told Tadashi slides himself down the table and lefts his legs placing his feet in the stirrups. 

“Great..” Dr. Ryugazaki says as he’s slipping on some things white gloves. “Now just let your knees fall to the sides.. perfect. All I’ll be doing is checking to see if there are any abnormalities, I won’t be pushing anything up inside you this time so try and relax.”

_This time? What the hell does he mean by this time?_

Tadashi squirms as he feels the sheet being lifted out of the way. 

“Well appearance wise you look like a normal male..” Tadashi feels hands on him now, lifting his shaft and moving it side to side and then up out of the way. The hands move onto his balls next, cupping them and then searching the sac to give each testicle a little squeeze. The hands move lower and spread his cheeks apart, he flinches again when he feels the cold air touch his entrance. 

Then everything is over, the sheet is being pulled down and an unloved hand is reached out to help him sit up.   
“As far as looks you look completely normal, if I wasn’t specifically looking for something different I might not have noticed. Your size in shaft is normal, your scrotum size is normal, your anus is also normal from the outside. What I did notice is your testicles themselves are very under developed. It’s odd, you seem to have gone through puberty normally, have you had any other problems, hormonal wise or functioning wise?” 

“What do you mean?” 

“Do you often become emotionally unstable, are you able to become erect and ejaculate easily?” 

Not trusting his words because of the serious blush on his face Tadashi nods. 

“I’d like the run some blood and a urine test to check hormone levels.” 

“That’s fine.” 

Walking to the cupboard where he pulled out the sheet blanket Dr. Ryugazaki pulls out the things he needs to draw the blood for testing. 

“I’ll draw blood now but the urine sample will have to wait until after the ultrasound because it’s best done with a full bladder.” 

Tadashi nods once again and holds out his left arm to be prepped for the testing. The upper arm is tied off and Tadashi feels the cold of the alcohol wipe against his flesh and then without warning there’s a small almost not noticeable prick of the needle entering his arm.

Dr. Ryugazaki takes 4 viles of blood and it’s over before Tadashi even has time to freak out about it.   
“Now the fun part. If you’d be so kind as to pull the gown back up and sit here in this wheelchair I can wheel you down the hall to where I keep the ultrasound machines.” 

Dr. Ryugazaki smiles brightly and Tadashi can’t help but feel butterflies in his stomach as he’s being wheeled down the hall. He’s going to get to see his baby, hopefully. 

Once in the room Dr. Ryugazaki instructs him to lay back cover his lower half with the sheet blanket and lift the hospital gown up over his abdomen. 

“The gel will be cold, I wasn’t planning on doing an ultrasound today so I didn’t warm any gel before hand but your uterus is telling me everything will be fine.” He squires the cold gel onto Tadashi. “I have to check out other things first but when I get to actually checking out inside your uterus I will let you know.” 

“Okay.”

The room is silent as the wand glides easily around Tadashi’s abdomen, he’s watching intensely but nothing seems to make sense to him.

“Interesting, very interesting indeed.” 

“Um, i..is everything okay?” 

“Oh yes my apologies, being a Dr. I’ve done a decent amount of ultrasounds for various reasons but I’ve never seen anything like this.” 

Tadashi looks from the screen over to Dr. Ryugazaki and sees the bright smile of fascination on his face and can’t help but laugh a little.

“These right here..” Dr. Ryugazaki points to the screen “and here are your kidneys, your bladder and lower intestines, everything looks normal but then here over to the left in the back you have something extra, I can tell just from looking that it’s an ovary, it seems you only have one where women usually have two and your one is very under developed. It’s amazing you were able to ovulate at all.”

_Even if you tell me what everything is it just looks like blobs to me._

“Now here is where you’ll want to pay attention. If I follow the tube from the ovary it should lead me to the uterus.. and ah here it is right where I’d expect it to be. Oh and such a nice size, nice healthy thick lining, looks very nice for baby…” there’s a few seconds of silence but it feels like forever to Tadashi as he searches the screen trying to pinpoint his baby.

“Ah! Speaking of baby here’s the little fetus now. Here let me zoom and get some measurements to tell you how far along you are. Would you like me to take pictures to print?” 

Tadashi is speechless, tears threatening to spill from his eyes. _I can’t believe it’s really happening, that’s our baby, mine and Kei’s._

“Yamaguchi?” Dr. Ryugazaki taps on his shoulder gently. “Would you like some printed copies?” He hands Tadashi a few tissues 

“Y..yes p..please” He may be full out crying again but these tears are happy tears and Dr. Ryugazaki can’t help but feel great full to be apart of this moment himself. 

“I’ll take the measurements and then take some nice screen shots for you to have then. You might feel a little uncomfortable as I apply more pressure to get different angles for the measurements but that’s normal.” 

After a few minutes go by Tadashi begins to squirm realizing how badly he needs to pee now.

“Baby looks to be about 10 weeks and 4 days along and very healthy with a heart rate of 186BPM, congratulations. Only a few more moments and then you can empty your bladder and we’ll head back to the exam room.” 

Tadashi nods and then his eyes go wide. Did he just see what he thinks he saw? Did baby just wave? 

As if reading his mind Dr. Ryugazaki speaks up. “Oh looks like baby wanted to say hello to you, that’s cute. Pretty soon you should be able to feel little movements, flutters of baby brushing against the inside walls. Okay and I’m done,” Dr. Ryugazaki hands him some tissues. “These are for the mess and here’s a sample cup to use when you relieve yourself. The bathroom is right through that door, I’ll have your things ready for when you come out.” 

After relieving himself and sitting back down into the wheelchair Dr. Ryugazaki hands him a manila envelope which Tadashi clutches the whole trip back to the exam room.

“There’s multiple copies of photos in there and also a movie disc that I started recording once I got to viewing your uterus. So you can go back and watch baby wiggling around when ever you would like to.” 

“Thank you very much for everything.” 

“I’ll step out now so you can get dressed and then we can discuss things further. I’ll be back in a few moments"


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Heart broken boys

Akiteru tidied up his brothers home as best he could then decided to make lunch for when Kei woke up. _There’s no way he had breakfast this morning and he probably won’t feel up to eating when he gets up but he needs to even if I have to force feed him._

The phone dings and it’s a message from Saeko.

‘I asked Ryu and got Sugawara’s number figured he’d know best but he said that Tadashi for sure hasn’t said anything to any of them.’

Another message.

‘I’m sorry babe I have to head out now keep me updated. I love you.’

He replies.

‘Thank you. I love you too.’

Sighing with defeat Akiteru goes into the kitchen and decides to make a simple omurice, looking into the fridge and cabinets he sees that everything is stocked up nicely. _Tadashi must have went shopping before he left and made sure Kei had all his favorites._ The thought makes Akiteru frown. _Just why did you leave Tadashi when you clearly still care about Kei._

Loading up a bed tray with the omurice, fresh cut strawberries, a black coffee and a small glass of orange juice Akiteru heads into his brothers bedroom to wake him up.

“Kei it’s almost noon now you should really wake up.” Akiteru places the tray on the bed side table and gently shakes Kei pulling the covers away from his face causing Kei to stir awake.

“Nii-Chan?”

“Hello sleepy head, I made phone calls and brought back your asprin but you were asleep so I let you sleep for a while, though a while turned into like 5 hours. I picked up for you and made you a light lunch, asprin is still on the bed side table if you need it.”

“So he’s really gone, Tadashi?”

“It looks like it, I can’t picture him pranking you like this and the majority of his things are gone.”

Kei reaches over to the bed side table putting his glasses back on and taking the asprin with some juice.  
“I hate to pry but did you two have a fight or something?”

“Honestly I can’t think of any reason why he would leave, things have been as great as always between us and… he’s been getting sick the last month or so. I told him to go to the Drs. because I thought maybe it was a virus but what if it was something serious after all?”

_Kei’s starting to panic, I have no clue how to console him though, what kind of big brother am I?_

“That’s does sound like Tadashi, leaving so he doesn’t burden you, but he would have had to tell someone. He’ll be found, Mom, Saeko and myself we’ll all help you find him. He still loves you, not only did he say so in his note but he stocked all of your favorites food wise and also took half of your photos of the two of you with him before he left.”

Akiteru grabs the bed tray and places it in front of his brother. “Please eat some food Kei and then we can come up with some type of plan to look for Tadashi, okay?”

Kei gives Akiteru a displeased look.

“I’m not saying you have..” Akiteru’s phone starts to ring. Pulling the phone from his pocket he sighs.

“It’s Mom. I’m going to take this out in the kitchen but you should eat something. You don’t have to eat everything but imagine what Tadashi would say if he knew you were refusing to eat the strawberries he picked put and bought for you?” _I’m sorry Kei I know that was low of me but I’ll do anything to get some of the color back in your face._

Standing up and walking to the door he answers the phone. “Hey Mom how are things going?” He closes the door and goes to sit down on the couch in the living room.

“Aki dear how is Kei?”

“Not so great, I found him asleep hugging Tadashi’s pillow when I got off the phone with you. I let him sleep and picked up for him. I just made lunch and brought it in to him so he’s hopefully eating. Did you find anything out?”

“I did and didn’t. Natsuki-San wasn’t aware of any problems between Kei and Tadashi. She did say that Tadashi called his cousin’s wife and asked if she would be willing to look over the shop for a while because he wanted to take a vacation. She tried calling him about it this morning to ask for how long but the number has been disconnected.”

_Damn you Tadashi, you didn’t even tell your own mother you were running away from something? Just what is going on with you._

“I asked Saeko to talk to her brother discretely since they were in volleyball together and have been in touch still. She got Sugawara’s number and called to ask him because if any of the friends knew something he would be the one to know but according to him Tadashi didn’t say anything about anything going on to any of them.”

“So what are we going to do Aki? We can’t just leave things as is, what about Kei?”

“I don’t know Mom, I called out for the next few days and Kei had me call his work to take the week off for him, thankfully everyone he works with knows and is supportive so they said take all the time he needs but I’m not sure I can take more than 2 or 3 days tops off.”

“It’s okay, you brothers bond and Mom here will come take over when needed. I’ll make Kei’s favorite for dinner for the two of you and bring it over, and before you say anything I won’t go inside. I’ll call you before I leave and you can expect me afterwards.”

“Thanks Mom. I’m going to go check on Kei and see if he’s eaten anything. Call me later before you come.”

“I love you both very much Aki.”

“We love you too Mom, goodbye.”

_Just what am I going to tell Kei now? He probably already knows about the phone being off but Tadashi even has someone else taking over the flower shop for him._

“Sorry Mom really likes to talk, she’s going to make us dinner and bring it over but she promised she won’t come in.” Walking back into Kei’s bedroom Akiteru see that Kei has eaten only a few bites of the omurice but has eaten all of the strawberries. _Guess I was right to put more strawberries than there was omurice on the tray._ He laughs in his head and smiles because Kei has eaten at least something.

“What else did she have to say?”

“I.. well I asked her to call Natsuki-San and ask questions, to help you rather than her rushing here and smother your till you’re beyond annoyed.”

“And I suppose she was calling back just now to tell you what she found out and the fact that you’ve said nothing yet means it wasn’t good.”

“No I’m afraid not. It seems Tadashi called his cousin’s wife and asked her if she would watch the flower shop for him while he went on vacation. She called him back this morning to see how long he would be gone and his phone was turned off. Seems he didn’t mention going away to anyone.”

“What else? I know you’re not telling me something.”

 _Damn it._ Akiteru sighs and runs his fingers through his hair, why does his brother have to be so observant?  
“Saeko called Sugawara this morning for me and he said Tadashi for sure hasn’t mentioned anything to any of them.”

That news seemed to hit Kei harder than Tadashi not telling his parents.

“So Tadashi didn’t even tell Sugawara huh.”

Kei leans back and slams his fist down into the mattress. “How the hell am I suppose to find him then if no one knows anything?! I need him Nii-Chan, burden or not I can’t be me without him! I..”

Kei has broken down again, tears streaming down his face. _Tadashi where are you? I’ll do anything to get you to come back to me so please just reach out to me once more. I need you, I love you._

“I can’t be me without you Tadashi.”

 

* * *

 

 

Knock knock.. “All set Yamaguchi?”

“Yes you can come in.”

“Very good, we’re almost done. It’ll be a little while longer though I was so distracted when you first came in I forgot to have you fill out this sheet questionnaire, if you could fill this out we can talk about your living arrangements at the same time to make things go quicker?”

“No problem.” Tadashi takes the sheet and it’s simple yes or no questions about his medical history which should be easy enough to fill out while talking.

“Since you’ve moved here specifically to be treated by me and your situation being what it is I have a small house you are free to live in for as long as you’d like. Of course while you are unable to work I will be covering your expenses. Before you say anything I won’t be paying for them out of pocket but with a grant I’ve received for studying your case and reporting back on how things are going. It’s not every day something like this happens so when it does the medical field is very interested and will do just about anything to get their hands on information.”

This makes Tadashi slightly uncomfortable, having others pay for his way of life.

“I.. I have a savings I’m able to use for a while.”

“That’s good because the grant won’t cover everything. I’ll be in charge of the housing costs which won’t be much cause I do actually own the house I just don’t use it. I’ll also be in charge of covering food expenses and making sure you have everything needed to keep a healthy diet. You’ll get a 5,000 yen allowance a week to put towards extra things like phone bill, internet, clothes as you get larger and baby items you may need or want but that’s not much compared to what babies need.”

Tadashi has finished filling in the questionnaire and hands it back to Dr. Ryugazaki.

“Thank you.” He turns to file it away in a folded named Yamaguchi T.

“I calculated your due date based off how far along the ultrasound dated you as. October 12th but you can go sooner than that, I’m not sure how long your body will be able to carry the pregnancy but I’m prepared to perform a caesarean as soon as you needed so no need to worry.”

_Caesarean? That’s right, I can’t carry this baby forever, eventually baby will have to be born and of course I can’t push it out because I’m not a female I don’t have the right parts for that. But October 12th, how lucky, baby will be born in between both our birthdays Kei._

“Alright shall we get going? We can grab some lunch and then I’ll show you to the house you’ll be staying in?”

Tadashi nods. “Okay good I’m actually really hungry.”

“We’ll stop at the pharmacy too so you can pick up your prescription I already had Nagisa call it in along with some vitamins so they should be ready to be picked up. Also any medication pregnancy related will be covered by the grant so you don’t need to worry about that.”

Dr. Ryugazaki starts walking out but stops just shy of the door and turns abruptly. “This is extremely unprofessional of me to ask but do you mind if Nagisa comes with us to lunch?”

“I don’t mind at all, he’s funny.”

Dr. Ryugazaki laughs lightly. “He is, that’s one of the many reasons I fell in love with him. If you do take him up on his offer to show you around know that anyone he introduces you to will accept you fully, he has the next two days off just incase you do need help so it won’t incontinence anyone.”

“Thank you very much, we’ve only just met and you’ve done so much for me already. I have no idea how I can thank you.”

“No need to thank me, I’m very pleased you decided to come here and let me be witness to this incredible journey you’re going on.” Dr. Ryugazaki smiles genuinely and slips his white coat off.

“Let’s head out shall we? I’m almost betting Nagisa is getting antsy waiting for me to see if we’ll be having lunch together or not. It’s something he forces into my schedule everyday so we don’t miss out on each other, even though we’re together most of the day.”

As soon as they reach the front reception area the blond bounces out from around the desk.

“Rei-Chan! Yamaguchi-Kun! Are you two finally done?”

“Yes Nagisa, well I’ve got to show Yamaguchi where the pharmacy is and where the house is but we figured we’d grab lunch at the same time so would you like to join us?”

“Seriously no joke? I want to I want to! Just let me shut down the computers and turn off the lights!”

“Alright but move it along Nagisa, Yamaguchi is hungry and needs to eat.”

“Oh right! Let’s go Yama-Chan we have to feed your baby! We can’t let her go hungry!”

_Yama-Chan? Her??_

“Nagisa don’t be so rude! I am so sorry again Yamaguchi. Maybe we should just leave him behind after all.”

“No I want to go I’m sorry.”

“It’s fine really, I don’t think anyone’s ever called me Yama-Chan before but I don’t mind. But he said her, were you able to tell that baby was a girl?”

“No its too soon for that, generally you can’t tell till around 20 weeks.”

“Call it a gut feeling if you must but I just know baby is going to be a girl!”

Tadashi breaks out into laughter once again. “You’re so cute Nagisa! Like a funny little stuffed animal that I want to squeeze and cuddle till I feel all better.” _A girl huh, she’d be a beautiful girl especially if she got Kei’s blond hair._

Nagisa is in full on blush mode when Tadashi looks over at him as they walk out to their perspective cars.

“We’ll go to lunch first, are you having any cravings or are there things you can’t eat lately without getting sick?” Dr. Ryugazaki asks.

“Um.. I want.. strawberry shortcake.”

“Very nice choice I’ll find a place, I’ll drive slow so just follow behind okay?”

“Okay.”

“See you soon Yama-Chan!”

Arriving at the small café Tadashi parks next to Dr. Ryugazaki and Nagisa’s car and follows them in, walking next to Dr. Ryugazaki but far behind Nagisa who is practically sprinting inside to grab a table.

“Yama-Chan! Come sit next to me, please!”

Tadashi accepts the invitation after Dr. Ryugazaki nods showing him that he doesn’t mind.

“Sure thing Nagisa.”

The waitress comes and takes their orders, coming back a few minutes later with their drinks.

“I should apologize now because I have no idea what kind of trouble he’ll get himself or us into while we’re out. He seems to be full of extra energy.”

“It’s really no trouble he kind of reminds me of someone I was on the volleyball team with in high school, who was always very energetic.”

“You were on the volleyball team?!” Shouts a very excited Nagisa.

“Mhm, Kei and I played together from middle school through high school.”

“That’s so awesome! Rei-Chan and I were on the school swim team! Though it was only the 5 of us there for two years and we weren’t very well known at first but that made it all the more fun.”

“Same here, well we had 12 members but that was still really small compared to the other schools we went up against. Then at first we were either not known or they knew us as “the flightless crows” because we use to be a power house school but did awful for a while.”

“Oh! My! Word! You’re from Karasuno?!”

“I am! How’d you guess?”

“Rei-Chan! That’s the team that I went and watched play with Sou-Chan that one time in Tokyo! Hey! No way! You’re the pinch server they used in that match! Your floaty serves were amazing, you scored like 5 points in a row one set!”

Nagisa’s eyes are shinning and Tadashi can’t help but blush at the compliments and amazement that someone he just met actually recognized him from so many years ago.

“Ye..yeah that was probably me.” He laughs lightly and rubs the back of his neck embarrassed.

“Amazing! I’m having lunch with a real champion! Oh which one was your partner? You said you played together so did he play in the match too?”

“Yep, number 11, Tsukishima Kei, tallest player we had, blond and black rimmed sports glasses.”

“Oh no way no way! The tall lanky middle blocker! He was good looking Yama-Chan you did good, your baby is going to have such good looking genes!”

The waitress returns with their food orders.

“Nagisa please calm down people are starting to stare because of how loud you’re being.”

“Oh sorry Rei-Chan.”

_Kei is good looking, he was the best catch I could have ever caught for a man. I wish he was here._

“And what do you mean by good looking? Didn’t you already have me when you went to that match, why were you checking out other men?”

“Is my Rei-Chan jealous? Don’t worry though baby you’re the only man I’ll ever need.” Nagisa winks and Dr. Ryugazaki blushes like it’s his job.

Tadashi wipes the tears from his eyes quickly hoping neither of them notice.

“Man you two are just too much together, I feel like I’m going to get a cavity and I haven’t even had my dessert yet.”

The table erupts with Nagisa’s laughter. “See Rei-Chan I’m not the only extra one here sometimes.”

A waitress comes by to collect their empty plates and take dessert orders.

“So Ryugazaki Sensei how..” he’s interrupted.

“Please, we’ll be seeing a lot of each other in and out of the office so just Rei is fine.”

Tadashi nods. “Then Rei, how long have you and Nagisa been together?”

“I think it was during our 2nd year high school we finally got together? I was originally on the track team doing poll vaulting our first year and then Nagisa pretty much stalked and harassed me until I joined the swim team.”

“Don’t make me sound like some criminal!”

“Well how would you describe yourself then?”

“Determined to fulfill destiny.”

“More like persistent because you were so desperate for a 4th swimmer to keep the club open.”

“Now, now Rei-Chan don’t be a poor sport just because you joined despite the fact that you couldn’t swim.”

“Woah wait, you joined swim club not knowing how to swim?”

“It’s true! Rei-Chan had all the formulas perfected but no matter what he would just sink straight to the bottom on the pool. Turned out he was only able to swim the butterfly stroke, which worked out well for us in the end.”

The waitress returns with their desserts. Tadashi got strawberry shortcake, Nagisa got a raspberry and cream filled pastry and Rei got a coffee cake. One bite into the strawberry shortcake and Tadashi is crying again.

“Something wrong Yama-Chan? Do you not like the cake, we can get you something else?”

Tadashi laughs dryly, he can’t help it Nagisa is just so cute.

“I should get something else, this is hardly my favorite dessert they had on the menu but I want it, I feel like I need it. Kei loves all things strawberry, especially strawberry shortcake. I guess I just want to feel closer to him.”

“You miss him?”

“Yes very much.”

“Can you call him?”

“Nagisa! Please..”

“No it’s fine. I could but he’s probably really mad that I just left while he was sleeping and he’d probably be even more mad if I told him I chose a child over our relationship.”

Nagisa rubs Tadashi’s back and Rei gives him his handkerchief. They decide it’s best to leave, they get their desserts in take out boxes and Rei decides to let Nagisa drive his car while he drives Tadashi’s to the house.


	5. Chapter 5

The ride to his new home was silent and awkward. Tadashi figured Rei was just giving him space and time to calm down on his own. Part of him was thankful that Rei didn’t try to pry more into his personal issues but another part of him wished someone would so he felt more justified while crying his eyes out.

“Yamaguchi we’ve arrived at the house, I’ll show you around and we’ll help you get settled in for tonight. It doesn’t look like you’ve brought much with you so we can bring this all in before we leave.”

Tadashi sniffles. “Thank you.”

“Welcome home Yama-Chan! It’s a great place, you know this was Rei-Chan and I’s first home together before we moved above the office for convenience. Rei-Chan is super sentimental which is why we haven’t sold it yet. So it’s really nice that it’ll finally be getting some use again after so many years being vacant.”

They were standing in front of a small 2 bedroom home, older styled compared to what Tadashi was use to but he always did have a soft spot for the more traditional looking homes so he didn’t mind. Tadashi couldn’t remember how they got there from the café, being too preoccupied with trying to keep more tears from spilling, but from what he can see around them is they’re a ways out of the small town.

The house is surrounded by tall trees and Tadashi can’t see any neighboring houses from where he’s standing. The distance might be tough to deal with at first since he’s use to always being in contact with someone but when he gets larger he knows he’ll be thankful not having neighbors around to gawk at his growing belly.

“It’s old fashion but it’s been beautifully kept up.”

“Yep, yep cause Rei-Chan and I come every Sunday to do yard work and clean together. Or we use to but now the house has you! I can still come every Sunday though to help especially when you get larger in the belly area.”  
Tadashi is once again laughing because of an adorably silly Nagisa.

“Please come everyday to visit me for as long as you can to make me forget how lonely I am.”

Nagisa pulls Tadashi into a tight embrace, he’s smaller than Tadashi so he tucks his own head under Tadashi’s chin pulling them as close together as possible.

“I will come visit you every day and hug you like this as often as you need me to. Well at least until you get fat cause then I won’t be able to get this close to you..” Nagisa steps back and stares at Tadashi. “You know Yama-Chan I can’t wait for you to get all fat and round, you’re going to be so adorable! Please let me give you lots of belly rubs when it happens!”

“Nagisa please don’t harass Yamaguchi and Yamaguchi if this guy over steps his boundaries just push him off, don’t be afraid I once pushed him into a lake because he was being too clingy. He’s always been really handsy.”  
“Oh um.. I.. I don’t mind. It’s nice to have the physical contact right now.”

“Yeah Rei-Chan leave me be and I’m not clingy!”

“Sure you’re not. Okay well I’ll be leaving you two here for a little. I completely forgot about stopping at the pharmacy to get Yamaguchi’s prescriptions. I know Yamaguchi’s the one that loaded all this stuff but Nagisa please don’t let him lift anything too heavy. If there is anything really heavy just leave it and I’ll grab it when I get back.”

Rei turns to look at Yamaguchi. “I stocked the place with food already, the basics anyways, Nagisa can show you the grocery store tomorrow so you can get things you like as long as you don’t just load the cart with all junk food like some other people do.” Rei turns and gives Nagisa a knowing look and then turns back. “You don’t look like you would but I know cravings can sometimes get the better of people sometimes.”

“Okay thanks again Rei.”

“Alright Yama-Chan! Let’s get this stuff inside, you heard Rei-Chan no heavy lifting for you. So tell me where you want stuff as I carry it in and you can start opening bags to put stuff away. Sound good?”

Tadashi nods. “I didn’t bring anything really big furniture wise, mostly just clothes, a few dishes, books and some photos. Everything can probably go in the living room to be sorted.”

“Aye-aye Yama-Chan!”

Tadashi walks inside and finds the living room, having a seat on the small sofa. Haha what a guy. I bet Kei would wish he was deaf after just a few minutes with Nagisa. Tadashi begins to absent mindedly rubs his still flat belly. _I’ll forever be here for you baby don’t worry about a thing, I’ll love you enough for both Kei and myself, I’ll make sure of it._

Suddenly there’s a loud thud and Tadashi jumps up noticing all his things are sitting on the floor in front of him and Nagisa is now sitting next to him on the couch holding out a handkerchief to him.

“Don’t you want to talk about it some more Yama-Chan?”

 _Why does Nagisa look so sad, he’s been a bright ball of sunshine since I met him._ Reaching up and touching his face and once he realizes he’s crying again the flood gates fully open and Tadashi allows himself to fall into Nagisa and pour his heart out.

“I miss Kei. I miss him so damn much Nagisa. We’ve been almost inseparable since middle school. He’s my first and only love I’ve ever had. I just feel like there’s a huge hole in my chest and I’ve only been gone less than a day. What am I going to be like tomorrow or a few weeks from now? I don’t know how to be me without Kei by my side.”

“Why don’t you call him and tell him how you feel?”

“Nagisa he hates children! Even when we were kids ourselves he didn’t like other kids. He once told me he was glad he ended up being gay because he didn’t have to worry about unwanted children. I.. I just can’t bring myself to tell him about this wonderful gift and have him say he doesn’t want it like I do. It’s different while I’m just thinking he’ll say it but if he actually said it I don’t think I’d be able to move on from it.”

He’s worked himself up too much, it’s getting hard to breathe and he feels like he’s going to throw up his lunch but he doesn’t see anywhere where he can let it out. Covering his mouth and frantically looking around the room Nagisa gets the hint and quickly helps Tadashi to his feet.

“This way Yama-Chan the bathroom is right here through this door.”

Seconds after the door opens and Tadashi is emptying the contents of his stomach just barely making it into the toilet. Nagisa stays with him rubbing his back lightly.

“There, there Yama-Chan let it all out. Rei-Chan will be back soon with the prescription to make you feel better.”  
The sickness subsides and Tadashi leans back against the wall, Nagisa passes him some toilet paper to wipe his mouth and then he leans and eye level with Tadashi’s belly.

“Ne little one stop making your daddy so sick all the time, he’s got it tough enough, give him nice little love flutters instead.”

A sadden expression on his face Nagisa looks back up at Tadashi. “I’m sorry I poked my nose into your business so much you ended up getting sick.”

“It’s fine, it’s not like it was your fault. I’m going through a bad breakup and I’m hormonal on top of being sick all the time so it’s obvious that I’m going to get sick at times. I’m sorry I almost puked on you.”

“It’s cool Yama-Chan. I like hanging out with you even if you..”

“Nagisa? Yamaguchi? I see everything was brought in but where are you two?”

“In here Rei-Chan!”

“Oh no did you get sick again Yamaguchi?”

“No Rei-Chan we’re partying in front of the toilet for fun.”

“With you being you I wouldn’t for even a second doubt that.”

“What’s that suppose to mean? Rei-Chan don’t be mean to your lover!”

“Me mean? I’d never.”

Tadashi laughs. _Oh God how can I not laugh when I’m with these two._

“I’m glad you can still laugh Yama-Chan, you’re so pretty when you smile with your whole face.”

Tadashi blushes at the sincere compliment.

“Alright Nagisa no more flirting with Yamaguchi, especially while you’re as you’ve just put it “lover” is right in front of you.”

“I’m no flirt Rei-Chan.”

“Sure you’re not. Here Yamaguchi you can take one now if you’d like. They’re safe to take whenever pretty much. Just don’t exceed 6 in a 24 hour period and you don’t have to worry about taking them with food or on an empty stomach. They should be in full effect tomorrow after you’ve had taken a couple.”

Rei holds his hands out and pulls Nagisa and Tadashi up to their feet and then walk back out into the living room. Nagisa and Rei trying to be discreet while bickering and Tadashi trying to keep himself together as to not laugh at them anymore.

“You didn’t bring much so we should be able to get everything sorted and put away before we leave and then you and Nagisa will have the whole day tomorrow to sight see.”

A very excited Nagisa starts lightly bouncing on his heels, eyes shinning. “I’m going to show you all the best places Yama-Chan!”

Tadashi gives a weak smile. “I look forward to it then.”

Unpacking goes smoothly, Rei shows Tadashi around the single floor house, there’s a small but practical kitchen that has a table for two, a toilet room next to the bathroom which has a washer inside, there’s a living room that has a small sofa and a kotatsu in it, a small empty spare room and then bedroom with one full size western style bed and on night stand.

“You’re free to use all of the things left in the house without worry. We do have some things packed away in the shed out back but it’s locked so you don’t have to worry about it at all.”

When they return to the living room Nagisa has already put most things away. The dishes have all been washed, dried and put in the cabinet in the kitchen, the book and photos are all on the single bookshelf in the living room and all Tadashi’s clothes have been taken out and put on hangers just ready to be brought down to his new bedroom and hung in the closet.

“I see you got to work quickly while we were walking around.” Rei walks over to Nagisa and ruffles his hair gently.  
“Th..thank you so much Nagisa, everything looks perfect.”

“No problem at all Yama-Chan!”

“He’s right Yamaguchi, he might always act carefree but he’s surprisingly tidy and helpful, two more reasons I fell for him.”

“Rei-Chan!” Nagisa is in full on blush mode again, red all the to the tips of his ears.

They really sickeningly sweet sometimes but I’m so happy I have them now.

“It’s already almost 5 now so we should get going now so Yamaguchi can relax tonight since he’ll be dealing with you all day tomorrow.”

“Rei-Chan! Don’t make it sound like I’m awful to be around. Yama-Chan has said more than once that he likes being around me!”

“For now yes but Nagisa try not to over work him tomorrow you know he’s doing the hardest job anyone could ever do, supporting new life inside himself.”

“I know Rei-Chan, I was mostly just going to drive him around and show him how to get places so he wouldn’t get lost or feel like he has to depend on us when he wants to do something.”

Rei smiles fondly and nods, lightly tussling Nagisa’s hair again.

“Did you need help making dinner Yamaguchi?”

“No I’m all set, I’m actually quiet good at cooking, you two will have to come for dinner one of these nights so I can thank you for all you’ve done for me.”

“We’d love to!”

“Yes Nagisa is right, please let us know once you’ve adjusted and we’ll schedule something. For now we’ll head out. I wrote down both our cell phone numbers and emails on a paper stuck to the fridge, along with the office number and fire/police numbers just incase. Feel free to get ahold of either of us whenever for whatever reason even if it’s not medical.”

“That’s right Yama-Chan! Moving to a new place alone can be scary but Rei-Chan and I are here for you.”

“Thank you again and I’ll see you tomorrow Nagisa, feel free to come early if you’d like to join me for breakfast. I always get up early and cook for two so I’m sure I’ll forget and end up with extra.”

The thought kind of makes him feel sad, tomorrow morning he will be eating without Kei for the first time in 3 years.

“Home cooked breakfast? I am so there Yama-Chan! This guy over here usually only has coffee and toast and then leaves early. It’s no fun.”

_Thank you Nagisa if only you knew how much simple plans to not eat breakfast alone my first real morning away from Kei means to me._

And just like that he’s alone. Going to the kitchen he can see that Rei really did stock up on pretty much everything for him. It’s dinner time and he should cooking even though he’s not hungry but the thought of him now supporting a new life inside himself forces Tadashi to find something to eat.

He settles on making a simple omurice and cuts up some strawberries he found in the fridge. He took his new medication a little while ago so he’s hope full that the food might stay down this time. Sitting down at the table for two Tadashi manages only a few bites of the omurice but eats all of the strawberries.

While eating them he thinks of Kei and quickly decides he’s ready for bed. Venturing into the living room he grabs his favorite photo of Kei and himself, it was the day Kei got promoted at work. They were sitting down in Kei’s new office and in front of them on the desk is the gift Tadashi bought Kei to celebrate, it was a name plaque with Tsukishima Kei written on it with a small imprint of a dinosaur skeleton on it. Kei had loved the gift so much he kissed Tadashi in front of everyone and at that exact moment Ennoshita snapped a picture.

After grabbing the photo Tadashi goes into the closet and grabs pajamas and the large hoodie he had stolen from Kei’s study at home. He changes quickly, places the photo on the bed side table and hugs the hoodie to his chest. It still smells like Kei, thank god. That night Tadashi fell asleep with his face buried deep in the hoodie and crying.

 

* * *

 

“Kei you’ve been in bed all day, how about we put a movie on in the living room together, we can watch the new Jurassic movie I know you have.”

“No thanks.”

“It’s almost dinner time, are you getting hungry? Mom said she would drop off some food for us soon but she won’t come in.”

“No.”

“How about just getting up to wash up really quick then before going to bed?”

“I’m fine as is.”

“Then…”

Kei interrupts him. “Enough already! You’re being annoying. If I wanted this kind of treatment I would have had Mom come here instead. I’m seriously fine so just leave me alone.”

“I just want to help. You called me here so tell me what to do then.”

“You don’t have to do anything, being here without pestering me is enough. Trust me.”

Akiteru sighs in defeat. “Fine. I’m going to go wait outside for Mom to get here, I’ll let you know when foods here incase you change your mind.”

Kei slides down into the bed and buries himself in the blanket and breaks down once more without care. _I’m sorry Nii-Chan I know you’re just trying to help but it’s hard to keep a straight face when you’re in front of me._

Akiteru’s phone rings.

“Hello?”

“Aki dear it’s Mom. Is now a good time?”

“Sure Mom what’s up, you leaving to bring dinner over?”

“Actually I’ve already left a while ago. If you aren’t busy would you mind coming down to the car to bring up the stuff? I don’t trust myself to not try and push my way in to see Kei.”

“Sure thing Mom I’m on my way down right now.”

“See you soon then Aki.” She hangs up right away afterwards.

Well at least she won’t be coming in like she promised, even if I do have to walk down all these stairs.

“Aki over here!”

An older woman shorter than him with the same colored hair pulls him into a crushing hug.

“Hi Mom how have you been?”

“Same old same old, it’s lonely at the house with you boys gone.”

“Don’t try and act like you don’t enjoy the peace.”

“You caught me.” She laughs. “I’ve been able to get a lot of crafts done that I was interested in in the past.”

“That’s great Mom. Saeko and I will have to come visit soon, it’s been a while.”

“It has hasn’t it? But I don’t expect a visit until you’re coming to tell me that I’m finally going to be a grandmother.” She gives him a sly smile.

“Mom I literally just told you that we’ve decided to stop taking precautions and letting it happen when it happens. It’s been two weeks, there’s no way it’s happened already.”

“You never know dear.” She shrugs. “So how is Kei doing?”

“He’s been in bed all day. I tried getting him to get up and do anything but he just called me annoying. Honestly I think he just wanted me to leave the room so he could cry more…. Mom I don’t know how to help him.”

“Your brother inherited your father’s personality that’s for sure. It’s best we just leave him be for now, when he needs something he’ll come to you like he did when he called you this morning.” She sighs. “I’m kind of hurt my baby didn’t call me when he was hurting but at least he called his big brother.”

Akiteru takes the bags from his mothers front seat of the car and looks over at her catching a glimpse of her sad smile.

“Well you better bring that up to him while it’s still warm. Promise you’ll call if you need anything, I’ll come right away, doesn’t matter what time it is.”

Akiteru bends down and kisses his mothers cheek. “Sure thing Mom. Be safe on your way home.”

When Akiteru finally makes his way back up to the apt. he goes straight to the kitchen and fixes up a bed tray with the dinner his brother brought along with more cut up strawberries just incase Kei refuses to eat again. But when he reaches the bedroom Kei is already asleep bundled in the blanket.

Turning around as quietly as possible and puts the food away before settling down on the sofa. The area around his eyes is even more red and puffy, he must have cried more after I left.

Kei doesn’t wake up again before Akiteru pulls out a guest futon and falls asleep in the living room.


	6. Chapter 6

The morning starts out early for Akiteru, he had planned on sleeping in until Kei got up but here he was rushing to get ready for work because of a call he had received 10 Minutes prior from one of his colleges in panic because one of their top clients was due to renew their contract but was refusing to work with anyone except their usual Tsukishima Akiteru.

“Kei are you awake?” Akiteru knocks twice and then opens the bedroom door to find his brother still asleep, eyes once again even more puffy and his brows furrowed together. Deciding not to disturb his brother or write a note he calls his mother as he’s making himself a quick breakfast.

“Aki dear is something wrong with Kei?”

“Good morning to you too Mom. No Kei’s the same, still in bed, but I got a call from work and I can’t avoid going in for this meeting. I’m getting ready to leave for work soon so I was hoping you could come here for when he wakes up. I don’t think him waking up to an empty house would be good for him right now.”

“Absolutely! I’ll be there in 10!” click. She hung up.

Wow goodbye to you too Mom.

Akiteru eats a quick breakfast that consists of toast and a cup of coffee and then grabs one of Kei’s suits to wear. _Damn you for being so tall Kei! Hopefully no one really notices it’s not the right size._

As promised 10 minutes pass and there’s a quiet knock at the front door.

“Hi Mom, thanks for coming so quickly and this early in the morning.”

“Nonsense Aki I’ve been up for hours and besides you know I’d do anything you boys needed me to do as long as I was capable.” She smiles brightly but Akiteru can see the dark circles under her eyes. Thinking she must have had a rough night worrying about Kei, Akiteru pulls her into a hug.

“Really thanks for everything you do Mom.”

“Oh Aki!” She returns his hug, gripping him tightly and sighing. “Alright you have to get going right? I can handle things here while you’re gone. Anything I should know before you go?”

“Kei didn’t leave bed all day yesterday besides to use the bathroom a couple of times. He slept through breakfast, I woke him for lunch but all he ate was a couple bites of omurice and the strawberries I cut up for him. But even for that little amount I had to force him by bringing up the fact that Tadashi bought them for him, he also went to bed without dinner. He’s had a few severe break downs that I’ve seen but I can tell by his eyes that he’s been crying even more when I’m not around.”

“Oh no.”

“The only thing I can think of is that we should continue to give him space and hope after grieving for a few days he will be more like himself again or at least get out of bed.”

“I suppose you’re right. Now off you go I can handle things here.” She smiles and pushes him towards the door.  
“Okay, okay I’m leaving, I’ll call you later and see how things are going.”

Removing her shoes and making her way to the kitchen she let’s her smile die down. _Making breakfast for Kei should be simple enough, Kei loves strawberries so he’ll eat pretty much anything that has to do with them no matter how foul his mood is. Amazing, Tadashi stocked all of Kei’s favorites._

Settling on pancakes with strawberry chunks inside and whip cream on top she loads a bed side tray adding a bowl of cut up strawberries and a large glass of orange juice. _There’s no way Kei will be able to pass up eating these._

“Kei sweet heart it’s time to wake up.”

Kei’s eyes instantly pop open, he reaches for his glasses and sits up against the headboard. His eyes bugged open and mouth slightly agape.

“M..mom? What are you doing here? Where’s Nii-Chan?”

“It’s very nice to see you too Kei. Aki got a call from work this morning and he absolutely couldn’t miss a meeting so he called me to be here when you woke up.” She smiled down at him and laughed. “Kei close your mouth before you catch flies. I made you breakfast so make sure you eat up.”

“No thanks I’m not very hungry right now.”

“Buuuuuuut Kei I made you pancakes with strawberry chunks in them, I worked really hard on them for you.” She gives him a look that sooner rather than later guilty him into taking the tray from her arms.

“Thanks Mom, they look really good.”

“Of course they are, I worked hard on them just for my beloved baby Kei.”

“Mom I’m not a baby, I’m a grown man.”

“Nonsense Aki and Kei will always be my babies until I die.”

“Please don’t talk like you’re going to die anytime soon.”

“That’s not what I meant and you know it. Now hurry up and eat and then I want you in the shower right afterwards so I can change the bedding. If you insist on laying around in bed for longer at least do it with a clean body and clean sheets.”

Kei’s speechless but still nods to signify that he at least heard his mothers words. She smiles in return and kisses his forehead before leaving the room. _Today is going to be a long day, damn Nii-Chan you couldn’t have called anyone else to come babysit me?_ Kei sighs and quickly digs into his plate because even though he said he wasn’t hungry he’s actually starving and the smell of strawberries is too much for him to pass on.

Once he’s done eating he brings the tray and empty dishes out to the kitchen, greeted with the smile of his triumphant mother. He scoffs and heads to the bathroom to shower.

Kei’s only skipped washing for one day but the water feels so nice against his skin, like it’s helping to melt the stress off him. He stays in there far longer than needed, mind blank just enjoying the feeling of the water running down his body and the steam surrounding him.

He feels amazing when he finally gets out but after one look in the mirror he’s bent over the toilet throwing up his breakfast. Seeing himself in the mirror he feels pity, the red puffiness to his eyes reminds him of how pathetic he is, crying like he has been and the fact that he’s been crying is because Tadashi is gone.

Hoping to avoid his mother he quietly climbs back into his bed, she’s changed the sheets like she said she would. Which would normally make him feel very relaxed however right now he just wants to be comforted by Tadashi’s scent and now that the sheets are changed the scent is gone.

Fumbling out of bed and rushing to the closet, he’s freaking out as he rips open the door and begins digging through what’s left inside but there’s nothing of Tadashi’s clothes wise. Nothing that he can find that has the comforting smell of Tadashi.

All the commotion has attracted the attention of his mother. “Kei dear what’s wrong?” She pears around the corner into the closet. “Are you cold I can dig out some more blankets for you if you want to…”

“Leave.” It’s a whisper that almost goes unnoticed.

“What was that baby? What do you need?”

Kei clenches his fists and looks away. ”I said leave, I need you to leave right now.”

“Why Kei what happened?”

“Just leave! I want you out now!”

“Wh..why? Did I do something? Tell me what’s wrong so I can help you.”

“Leave! Leave! Leave! Leave! I don’t need you here! I don’t need anyone!” He screams while looking down at the floor, tears threatening to fall. He knows it’s unfair of him to lash out at his mother like this but he can’t help it. She just took away his only comfort even if it was on accident.

“I..I..I’m sorry. I’ll leave.” Her voice is trembling and she quietly retreats.

Kei stays there on the closet floor and listens as his mother gathers her things to leave and as soon as he hears the front door close behind her he allows himself to break down once again. The tears fall and Kei let’s out a loud scream, a mixture of pain, frustration and guilt. _I’m sorry Mom, I just can’t be around anyone right now._

Time feels like it’s frozen in this moment, there’s nothing more Kei can do but let himself go even more. Falling forward he curls into himself on the floor and allows himself to fall asleep.

Outside the apt. Kei’s mother makes her way down the stairs to her car, blank faced she’s unsure of how long she’s sat there until she hears her phone ring.

“Yes?”

“Mom? It’s Akiteru.”

“Of course it is, how’s work?”

“My meeting just finished so I’m calling to check and see how Kei is doing?”

“Oh..Kei he..”

Silence.

“Mom you still there?”

“I thought.. I thought things were going good. I made breakfast, he ate, showered and.. and then.. I had to leave. Kei told me to leave, that he didn’t need me.”

“He did what?!”

“It’s fine Aki, I must have done something to upset him.”

“Upset or not he has no right. My meeting is over so I’m heading back over there now.”

“Please don’t be angry with him, he’s gone through a huge shock in the last day, he’s on edge.”

“I’ll deal with it Mom. Take care I’ll call you later. Goodbye.”

“Goodbye Aki.”

An hour later and Akiteru finds himself standing in his brothers closet door way looking down at his brother who is laying curled up on the closet floor, half undressed with still damp looking hair. He’s crying even though he’s asleep, looking more awful than when he found him yesterday morning.

_Oh Kei. Just what am I going to do with you. I came here to yell at you but I just can’t bring myself to when you look this bad._

Reaching down Akiteru shakes his brother. “Kei get your ass up.”

Kei rolls over and rubs his eyes in effort to get them to open. “Nii-Chan?”

“Who else is it going to be? You yelled at our mother and made her all upset so she sure as hell isn’t going to be the one standing here.”

“I.. I’m.. she..” nothing he’s saying is making any sense.

“It’s whatever for now, you’ll apologize later because right now she understands you’re not yourself. But seriously Kei get up off the closet floor, what are you even doing in here? Get back in bed if you’re going to sleep.”

“No.”

“What?”

“I don’t want to.”

“And why not? You were sleeping there just fine this morning.”

“She changed all the bedding.. now it doesn’t smell like Tadashi.”

_Seriously?! That’s why he’s freaking out so much?_

“Does it bother you that much that you feel you have to sleep on the floor?”

“Yes.”

_I know Kei has always been stubborn but to be this sensitive about the bedding being washed._

“Just grab something else of Tadashi’s and get in bed, you’re going to get sick if you stay here on the floor half-naked with damp hair.”

“You think I didn’t think of that? Look around there’s nothing in here that belonged to him. Now just get out. I know you’re trying to help because I called you and you’re worried but I’m fine as I am.”

“How is this fine?! Kei look at yourself will you. You’re sleeping on the floor because the bedding was washed, you haven’t been eating good and your eyes are so puffy from all the crying you can barely open them! You need…”

“Don’t tell me what I need! The only person I need by my side is Tadashi! Now if you would just leave already I’d like to go back to sleep.”

Kei is looking straight into his brothers face, no signs of wavering in his determination to be alone.

“Fine cry yourself ragged on the floor for all I care! I won’t come so quickly the next time you need me!”

Storming out and slamming the front door Akiteru stopping on the stairs a few floors below Kei’s floor. Regret filling his mind but he shakes it off and continues on. Sure he’s mad but he knows Kei didn’t mean what he said and Kei must know that he didn’t mean what he said either.

 

* * *

 

Tadashi’s morning went much smoother than the previous morning, he woke at his normal time, showered and got dressed like usual and made breakfast for two like always. The only differences was that he had taken medication before getting in the shower and he was alone in a new place. However he was only briefly alone, Nagisa had shown up nice and early just as breakfast was finishing up which Tadashi was very thankful for.  
“Gooooood morning Yama-Chan! I’m not too early am I?”

“You’re right on time, I was just about to plate the food if you want to join me in the kitchen.”

Nagisa set the table and poured juice while Tadashi brought over the plates of food. There was pancakes, scrambled eggs, sausage and cut up fruit.

“This looks amazing Yama-Chan! Is this the kind of breakfast you usually do every day?”

“Mostly, Kei’s never been a big eater but he does enjoy food so I’ve learned to make a lot of different things so he always had choices.”

Taking a bite of the pancakes Nagisa moans and bounces in his seat.

“Soooo good and fluffy!” He continues to shovel the food into his mouth with no restraint. Tadashi laughs and slowly begins to eat his own breakfast.

After breakfast is done Nagisa helps Tadashi wash up the dishes and wipe down the table. Thanking him multiple times for the amazing breakfast.

“So are you all set to head out now Yama-Chan? Rei-Chan gave me the car with a full tank so I can show you all around.”

“Yeah I think so.” Nagisa looks beyond excited as they walk out and load up into Nagisa and Rei’s car. “Where are we going today?”

“I’m at your service today to show you anywhere you think you might want to go!” He smiles brightly. “Of course there are boring places Rei-Chan is making me bring you but they’re important for you to know so I don’t mind.”

“Thank you for all you’re doing for me,” Tadashi looks down and gently rubs his still flat tummy. “for us.”

“Rei-Chan and I are actually not from here either but I agreed to move here with him because of this work opportunity for him. Most of our friends still live near our home town, I get kind of lonely sometimes so I’m really happy that you need me.” His smile is sad and he coughs to clear his throat but he remains silent for a few minutes as he continues to drive.

“Aaaaand here we are, this is the main area of our small town, this road has the majority of everything important on it.” Slowly driving down the road Nagisa points out what’s what. “The grocery store, pharmacy, town hall and police station are one building here. A little further down you’ll see the café we went to yesterday.”

“If you go all the way down and turn left you’ll end up at the station but if you go right you’ll find the other important places. Our office and home, the library though it’s small.” Nagisa pulls the car over down the road a little ways from the office across from the library. “We don’t have much here but this place here is one of my favorites, it’s the local indoor swimming pool. Obviously since I did swim I love it but I asked Rei-Chan and he said that swimming is very good for pregnancy so if you’d like we could go sometime together maybe.”

“I’m not very good so I’m not sure how fun it will be for someone who is but if you’re okay with that then I’d love to.”

“How not good are we talking here? Will you sink to the bottom of the pool and almost drown?”

“Um no I’m not that bad.”

“Perfect then you’ll already be easier to swim with than it was with Rei-Chan and besides we’re not competing so as long as you don’t drown on me it’ll be just fine.” Nagisa gives his signature blinding smile once again. “Anyway that’s about it for our small town, not much to see but it’s been home for Rei-Chan and I for almost 10 years now.”

“It’s the perfect quiet place to start over.”


	7. Chapter 7

Things have become routine for Tadashi since he left Kei a week ago. Waking up the same normal time, having breakfast with Nagisa, spending the day with him and then crying himself to sleep hugging Kei's sweatshirt. However today will be different, not only does Nagisa have to return to work but Tadashi has his next Drs. Appointment.

Breakfast alone for the first time since leaving Kei left Tadashi feeling numb but luckily he didn’t have time to dwell on it because he needed to be at the office early for his appointment. Eating and quickly getting ready Tadashi put on his best ‘I’m doing just fine on my own face’ as he could and left.

Arriving at the Drs. office Tadashi was greeted by a bright smiling Nagisa.

“Yama-Chan! Its so great to see you!”

“Nagisa you were just with him yesterday.”

“Oh hush Rei-Chan that’s already too long for me.”

Laughing lightly Tadashi followed Dr. Ryugazaki into the exam room.

“Alright now Yamaguchi I know I did the initial examination last week but I need to do a more in depth exam today before you get much further along to hopefully avoid stirring things up. Did you follow the instructions I left you with yesterday?”

Blushing as he nodded Tadashi looked away. He did in fact follow the embarking instructions to clean himself out and even stretch for the internal exam this morning.

“Great. No need to be embarrassed every male goes through this at least once in their life time in a way. Now if you would my mind undressing while I step out, I’ll back in in just a moment.”

Undressing his lower half rather quickly Tadashi couldn’t help but continue to blush as he thought about what was about to happen. Tadashi has only ever been intimate with Kei and they never used toys so he worried how he'll react having an ultrasound wand pushed up his rear.

“Yamaguchi are you ready?”

“Ye..yes"

Entering the room and pulling the curtain shut Dr. Ryugazaki sighed as he looked at the very anxious Tadashi.  
“No need to be scared, I’m only going to enter slightly with the wand to see if I can find the opening leading to your womb. I can numb you if you’re to worried about how long it’s been since your last sexual encounter?”

Quickly shaking his head Tadashi looked away. “Nagisa suggested I prep a little earlier so it wouldn’t be so hard on me.”

And now it was Dr. Ryugazaki’s turn to blush, coughing to clear his throat he nodded. “Very good, though it was unnecessary of him to get involved I should scold him later…”

“Okay now I’ll explain what’s about to happen. If you could lay back and place your rear end at the end of the table slightly hanging off we will put your feet back in the stirrups. Now I don’t need to physically look you over so you’ll be covered by this sheet the whole time.”

Doing as he was told Tadashi got into position.

“Perfect, now this is the internal ultrasound wand. I’m going to hand this to you under the sheet and I need you to put the first bit inside and I’ll do the rest from there.”

Nodding Tadashi took the wand like machine and hissed as he felt the cold lube and let out a long breathe as he felt it breach his hole.

“Sorry! I forgot to mention I’d already put lube over the covering to help ease it in.” Dr. Ryugazaki apologized as he eased his hand under the sheet and grasped the end of the wand. “Now take some steady breathes for me I need to go in just a little further.”

The pressure Tadashi felt was unpleasant but not unbearable. It could be worse. Breathing in and out Tadashi tried to relax as much as possible as the wand probed around inside him.

“Amazing! I know we’ve already seen the ovary, womb and even the baby but this right here is how it all happened. This little slit right here is the opening to lead up to your womb. Some semen must have slipped inside here and hence baby! Just let me take some screen shots and we'll be done. You must be uncomfortable. The government won't be satisfied without images.”

_Of course._ Tadashi thought, it all comes down to pleasing the government.

“Alright now I'll remove the wand, please don’t hold your breath.” Taking a few deep breaths Tadashi closes his eyes and nods is head signaling that he was ready and on queue Dr. Ryugazaki carefully slid the wand put from within him.

“I’ll need to examine you more closely after the baby is born, I wouldn’t want to risk triggering anything but for now this should satisfy the government. Shall we take a peek real quick and see how baby is doing?”

Tadashi quickly nods his head as he slides up the bed table further and lifts his shirt.

“I thought you might like that,” Dr. Ryugazaki laughs, “actually the government wants weekly progress updates but I figured you wouldn’t mind.”

“Not at all.” Tadashi smiles. “Oh actually can Nagisa come back?”

“I’m sure he’s free right now but are you sure? Don’t let him pressure you into letting him in.”

“Oh no no, it’s actually been really nice to have a friend these days.”

Dr. Ryugazaki smiles genuinely. “Well alright I’ll be right back with him.”

And as promised the pair were back in record time with a visibly impatient Nagisa leading the way.  
“Hurry Rei-Chan we can’t leave Yama-Chan waiting!”

“Slow down Nagisa don’t run! I am so sorry Yamaguchi, he was waiting right outside the room the whole time apparently.”

Tadashi laughed. _Of course he was._

“Hush now Rei-Chan, show me that sweet baby girl already, I’m dying here.”

“Now now we still don’t know the gender of the baby it’s too early to tell.”

“I’m telling you right now, baby is a girl, it’s a but feeling and I’m never wrong.”

“Nagisa when have you ever predicted the gender of a baby?”

“That doesn’t matter. I have great instincts. Now let’s get on with it Rei-Chan.”

“Don’t rush me Nagisa! Yamaguchi are you sure you want him in here, he’s distracting.”

“Am not.”

“Are too.”

Tadashi can’t help but laugh. _Seriously perfect together._ “Yes I’m sure.”

“That’s fine then. Now remember the gel will be cold.. aaand.. here they are right here in the front of your womb. It’s like they knew we were about to take a peek.”

The tears are instant for Tadashi. _Even though it’s only been a week baby is so much bigger._

“Baby looks perfect, right on track I’d say.”

_Kei if only you could see our baby and love them like I do._

 

* * *

 

 

Days go by and Akiteru finally returns to his brothers apartment, only to find Kei still curled up on the closet floor looking even worse than before. _Come on Kei you’re better than this._ Thinking of how to help him only one thought comes to mind. “I’m sorry Kei you have left me with no choice." He whispers as he steps out of the room phone in hand.

“Yes this is Akiteru, I’m sorry to be calling out of the blue but Kei needs help and I don’t know who else to call… yes we're over at his apartment… thank you… see you soon.”

As promised an hour later there’s a quiet knock at the door and a turn of the knob.

“Hello? Akiteru-San?”

“Yes here! Thank you again for coming I had no idea who else to call, Kei isn’t handling Tadashi bring gone very well. He’s stopped eating and caring for himself completely from what I can tell, he’s even yelled at our mother and myself but I know o can’t leave him as is any longer.”

“No we can’t have that now can we. Where is he now?”

“Asleep on the closet floor, our mother managed to get him to shower a few days ago but she washed the bedding while he was in there and he had a melt down once he realized the sheets no longer smelt like Tadashi.”

“My poor boy. Well leave him to me I’ll have him up and going in no time.”

Following after his last hope Akiteru hung back as the closet door was swung open loudly.

“Tsukishima Kei get up right now!”

And to Akiteru's surprise Kei did just that, quickly scrambling to cover up and put his glasses on his face.  
“S..Suga-San?!”

“Yes I’m here.”

“Wh..what are you doing here?” Kei looks behind Suga to find Akiteru avoiding eye contact. Figures Nii-Chan called him.

“Come on get up we'll talk after you’ve cleaned yourself up and eaten.” 

Pulling his knees to his chest Kei shakes his head and looks away.

“I’m not taking no for an answer. Letting yourself go like this isn’t like you at all.”

“You don’t know anything.” Kei spat angrily looking straight into Suga's eyes.

“I know the situation and how you must be feeling right now but nothing you’ve done will bring Tadashi back. Certainly not sleeping on a closet floor smelling like God knows what I’m smelling but it isn’t pleasant.”

Leaning down Suga tries to pull Kei to his feet only to have him violently pull away.

“Leave me alone!”

*slap*

A moment of silence goes by as both Tsukishima brothers are stunned from what just happened. 

“You will get up right now and go shower, then you’ll eat the lunch I make you. You won’t fight me on this Kei, let me help you.”

Letting the tears falls Kei pulls in on himself even more.

“I didn’t ask for your help.”

“I know you didn’t but you need it, what would Tadashi say if he saw you right now? Would he be happy? I think not.”

“Tadashi.. he.. I can’t live without him.”

Falling to his knees Suga wraps his arms around a trembling Kei.

“Then we'll look until we find him. But first you need to help me help you.”

Feeling Kei nod his head Suga stands up helping Kei along with him.

“Now go have a bath while I make us some lunch. Wash well and I mean well, I don’t even want to know when the last time you bathed was. Then after we get some food in your stomach we’ll talk about finding Tadashi. Okay?”

The room is silent until the water can be heard running in the bathroom.

“Sorry about that Akiteru-San, the slap might have been over the top but the Kei that was sitting there wasn’t going to listen to a word anyone said to him.”

“No you’re right and I wouldn’t have had it in me to do it so thank you. But what will we do now? You said you’d help him find Tadashi but there’s no clues to where he’s gone to.”

“That’s true but for now we should focus on getting Kei cleaned, fed and back on his feet. Tadashi couldn’t have just disappeared into thin air so we'll find him.” 

A while later the bathroom door opens up and a refreshed looking Kei steps out and sits down at the kitchen table. 

With red rimmed eyes Kei looks over to his brother. “I’m sorry for the trouble I’ve caused.”

Akiteru quickly crosses the kitchen and wraps his arms around his not so little Kei. “Its no trouble at all for me. However you do need to call and apologize to Mom.” 

Kei nods against his brothers shoulder as he sighs. “I was really awful.”

“Its okay now as long as you realize it. Now let’s eat up some lunch Sugawara made us all food and it smells really good.”

Zoning out Kei ate his food in silence not listening to the idle chatter of his brother and Suga. Thinking back he inwardly cringes. _I’ve been nothing but pathetic, who knew Tadashi had this much hold over me._

“Kei are you listening?”

“Hm?” 

“Finally I thought I lost you there for a minute you weren’t listening at all were you.”

“I’m sorry.”

“Its fine, I was just saying I’m going to ask Daichi if there’s anything he can do to find Tadashi, even though he’s not legally a missing person I’m sure Daichi will do something for us.”

“That’s right! Sawamura became a police officer. How handy.”

Suga blushes.

“He'd be handy even without the title but in this situation yes it’s very useful. I’ll speak with him tonight when I get home.” Suga smiles brightly. 

“Now Kei we need to talk about how to help you. Ennoshita has been worried he hasn’t been able to reach you. He’s kept up with the work load from what I understand but they’re all wondering when you’ll be returning to work it’s been 10 days.”

Kei's eyes widen in shock as he gets up to find his work laptop. Quickly typing away answering emails as soon as he’s opened it, digging out his cell phone to make a call. 

“Ennoshita, Tsukishima here, I’m calling to inform you I will be returning to work tomorrow.” 

“That’s wonderful Tsukishima, the higher ups understand your situation but have been getting impatient for your return.”

“I don’t doubt that, sorry for throwing my work load at all of you.”

“Nonsense, though a lot of us are wondering how you usually manage that much work by yourself, you’re amazing Tsukishima.”

“That much is normal. I’ll see you tomorrow then.”

“Yes goodbye Tsukishima.”

Hanging up Kei looked up to see his brother and Suga standing in the doorway smiling. 

“Good to see you acting like yourself again little brother, now call Mom.”


	8. Chapter 8

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Congratulations it's a ... !

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If you didn't read my previous chapter 8 I deleted I added it to the end of chchapter 7 because I felt it fit better there.

The week crept by Tadashi and before he knew it he was 17 weeks along and sitting in one of the back exam rooms of the Drs. office.

“Are you ready to see the progress of your little one Yamaguchi?” Dr. Ryugazaki asked.

“Can Nagisa come in? I promised him I would ask.” Tadashi replied nervously.

“He’s not pressuring you is he? I know he can get overbearing sometimes without realizing it.”

Tadashi shakes his head and arms in rejection. “No, not at all, it’s be nice to have someone… a friend.. in here is all I thought.”

“Well as long as you’re sure, we don’t officially open the clinic for another hour so he’s not needed.”

Nodding Tadashi relaxes back into the bench as Dr. Ryugazaki leaves the room to fetch Nagisa. Smiling to himself at the thought of sharing this moment with someone else, someone he has grown to consider his best friend over the last 2 months.

Returning rather quickly Tadashi can’t help but laugh at the couple’s banter as they enter the room.

“Yama-Chan!” Nagisa cries out as he runs forward wrapping his arms around the other. “Rei-Chan is being a meany again!”

“I was just making sure you were pressuring him for your own curiosity.”

“I would never!” Nagisa shouted. “Yama-Chan is my best friend!”

“I see.” Is all Dr. Ryugazaki replied with before turning away but not without Tadashi seeing the small smile on his face.

“Now Yamaguchi would you like to know the gender if baby cooperates?”

“Of course we do!” Nagisa answered. “What kind of question is that when you already know Yama-Chan and I have a shopping date today.”

“Will you calm down Nagisa-Kun, as a professional I need to ask these things, I can’t just base things off what my partner tells me during dinner, now hush. I was asking Yamaguchi.”

Once again Tadashi couldn’t help but laugh at the other two, they were such an entertaining couple.  
“Yes, please.”

“Very well, lay back, raise your shirt and slightly lower your bottoms for me.”

Quickly doing as he was told Tadashi situated himself and reached over to Nagisa who wordlessly held his hand in return.

“Remember the gel is cold.”

Tadashi nods and squeezes Nagisa's hand just a little more as Dr. Ryugazaki applied the gel to his small but noticeable bump.

“Alright let’s get the little one up on the screen. I’ll point out all the important parts, I need to take all kinds of measurements so it’ll be a while… oh good you followed instructions and came with a full bladder… and heeeere is little baby now.”

Tadashi's eyes flew to the screen, seeing a much larger more distinct baby shape, the tears in his eyes were immediate.

_That’s our baby Kei._

The room was quiet as Dr. Ryugazaki got the measurements needed every once in a while pointing out vital point such as the beating heart, making Tadashi cry even more.

“And finally here are her princess parts, congratulations you’re having a girl.”

“A girl! Yama-Chan you’re having a girl! I was right so there Rei-Chan!”

_A girl Kei, we're having a daughter._

“That’s all for today, I made sure to print every possible thing I could, you may wipe off the gel and relieve yourself in the restroom through that door. We'll talk once you come back.” Dr. Ryugazaki said.

Wiping off the gel and relieving himself never felt so good. With the overwhelming joy and excitement he was feeling he forgot how full his bladder actually was.

“Alright now everything looked perfect, little miss is measuring at 17 weeks 6 days so just a little ahead than where I had thought but that’s perfectly fine. I’ve put your printed photos and DVD disc copy of today’s session in the envelope like last time so you can re watch later if you want.” Dr. Ryugazaki handed him a large envelope. “And you’re free to go once Nagisa-Kun has scheduled your next appointment in one months time.”

“Thank you very much for today Dr. Ryugazaki and thank you for being here with me Nagisa!” Tadashi sniffled.  
“Oh Yama-Chan I couldn’t imagine missing out on this moment with you, thank you for allowing me to be here!” Nagisa sobbed and flung his arms around the other.

“That’s quiet enough you two, Nagisa go make him appointment then you two can get out of here.”

“But Rei-Chan I’m needed here for a few hours.”

“Nonsense I can manage alone for 2 appointments, go enjoy your date just remember to come home to me later.”

“Oh Rei-Chan no need to be jealous! Yama-Chan may be my bestie but you’ll always be my one love.”

“I’m not jealous!” Dr. Ryugazaki blushed. “I meant come home to me later and tell me all about what you bought. Remember I need to make down his spending for the government.”

“Sure Rei-Chan sure whatever you say.” Nagisa laughed and pulled on Tadashi's hand. “Lets go I know some great stores in the neighboring town for baby clothes! We should go check them out while you’re still small enough to hide it cause Rei-Chan says you shouldn’t travel too much once it becomes more noticeable.”

“For safety purposes!” Dr. Ryugazaki intervenes. “Not everyone out there will take kindly to a pregnant male.”

This saddens Tadashi of course there will be people out there who might want to harm him for the abomination he is. For the safety of his daughter though he won’t allow them.

* * *

In the weeks since Tadashi has left Kei had fallen apart to the lowest of the low and now it may seem like he’s back on top where he was before but he’s only moving on auto pilot. It’s been seven weeks since Tadashi left and no one has heard a single thing about where he has run off to.

Not even Daichi has found any leads who is a police officer but there’s only so much he can legally do since Tadashi left by choice.

“Suga-San I really don’t need you to come check on me every day, between you and my brother I never have any time to myself.”

“That’s the point Kei. You may do fine at work because you’re busy but at home when you have nothing to do your thoughts aren’t so kind to you.”

“I’m not a child, I don’t need constant supervision!”

“Oh Kei, no one is treating you like a child we're all just worried. Last week you forgot to eat for 3 days and passed out at work.”

Kei could see where Suga was coming from but it still didn’t make it any easier to accept people in his personal space so often, he had to deal with people at work already more than he liked.

“I know Daichi wasn’t much help but I still think we'll fund him sooner or later. You’ve tried his phone number calling and texting, how about emailing him?”

“You think I’m dumb enough to have not tried that at least 5 times already?!” Kei shouted. “..sorry.”

Suga wrapped his arms around a trembling Kei and squeezed tightly. “We will find him, I’ll help you search to the ends of the world for him if I have to.”


	9. Chapter 9

"A girl Yama-Chan! I can’t believe it, it felt so unreal even while seeing her move up on the screen.”

“I haven’t even felt her move at all yet so I was worried."

“Don’t worry anymore baby girl was moving just perfectly on screen, everyone feels baby move at different times, plus you’re still fairly early on too some people won’t feel it till after 20 weeks their first time around.”

Tadashi relaxed the more Nagisa talked.

“I should really leave the car here for Rei-Chan in case of emergency but I can drive us in yours if you don’t mind since I know where we’re going.”

“Sure that sounds great.” Tadashi replied as he dug put his keys from his pocket to pass to Nagisa.

“Rei-Chan says we have to get you a new phone as well so he gave me the government card.”

“Th..that's not really necessary.” Tadashi suddenly began to panic. He liked not having a phone, it made not reaching out to Kei that much more easier.

“Nonsense if there’s an emergency you need to be able to reach Rei-Chan or if you need someone to talk with you can reach out to me, you know emotional support or to make fun plans they’ll never know.” Nagisa laughed sincerity.

“Alright let’s go do some shopping for baby girl.”

“Hotaru.”

“Hm?”

“Her name.. Hotaru, with the spelling like her father’s name.”

“That’s perfect. Now then let’s go do some shopping for little Hotaru-Chan.”

Shopping with Nagisa wasn’t what Tadashi expected. Nagisa was calm and very considerate. There was no yelling or over excitement, no tossing overly expensive items into the cart or even any items at all without consideration for the size, price and if Tadashi even liked said item.

Tadashi was extremely great full to have some one like Nagisa by his side though he couldn’t help the tears that began to fall as he wished Kei was there with him.

“Alright how about we call it a day? It’s been very emotional, we can shop another time ne?” Nagisa suggested as he rubbed Tadashi's back.

Not trusting his words Tadashi nodded and wordlessly left Nagisa with his wallet to pay for the baby items while he went to the car.

Oh Kai was this the right decision? I miss you so much, I don’t know if I’m strong enough to do this without you.  
In that moment of doubt Tadashi felt little Hotaru move inside him as if encouraging him to keep going.

The car ride home was silent as Tadashi sniffled and absent mindedly rubbed his tummy and when they got to Tadashi‘s new home Nagisa helped Tadashi inside and settled him in bed.

“Rei-Chan is picking me up he finished early. I set up your new phone with a local number and put mine and Rei-Chan’s numbers inside plus the clinic number, I wrote your number down on the paper on the night stand.”

Nagisa bent down a d hugged Tadashi tightly.

“I wish I could be enough for you but I can see the hurt in your eyes and it hurts me. Yama-Chan you’ve become my best friend and I know you don’t want to but you need to reach out to someone from before. It doesn’t have to be Tsukishima but maybe your Mother or whoever was your closest friend. Tell them a little bit about what’s going on or don’t but just call and see how they’re doing and talk.”

Letting go Nagisa stood up with tears in his eyes.

“I hope you’ll manage to feel better, I’ll be here tomorrow morning to check on you, I have to go now bye-bye Yama-Chan!”

The room was silent for a long time before Tadashi broke down even further. How could he possibly call anyone after leaving 7 weeks ago without a word to anyone not even his own mother. Pulling out his old phone Tadashi fiddled with the buttons scrolling through his contacts, taking a very few of them and adding them into his new phones phone book.

_Do I even have the right to call any of them?_

Pressing call Tadashi listened as the phone ring.

“Hello Suga speaking. Hello? …”

“…Suga-San..”

“Tadashi?! Tadashi is that you?”

“Suga-San!” Tadashi sobbed into the phone even louder.

“Tadashi are you alright? Where are you? I’ll come to you immediately!”

“You can’t.. Suga I can’t. I miss Kei so much.. how do I live without him by my side.”

“Calm down, tell me where you are please Tadashi.”

“I can’t, no one can know. I’m a monster.”

“What do you mean Tadashi I don’t understand. Do you know what Kei is going through right now. He’s sick with worry looking for you. Please tell me where you are so I can come get you.”

“I’m having a baby! ..I can’t go back to Kei!”

“A baby?! Tadashi how.. you?”

“It wasn’t planned, Suga-San I miss Kei so much it hurts to even breathe without him by my side.”

“Call him. I’m sure even with this he’ll…”

“NO!” Tadashi shouted. “I’m sorry Suga-San but you absolutely can’t tell Kei I called.”

“I don’t know if I can keep the promise Tadashi.”

“You have to! He hates children Suga-San and my daughter deserves nothing but love.”

“Daughter?! Tadashi are you being serious?”

“We found out today, I’m naming her Hotaru.”

“Hotaru as in?”

“Yes the same spelling as Kei. I love him still.”

“And your partner is okay with this.”

“It’s my choice I’ll be caring for her alone after all.”

“Tadashi please just tell me where you are I promise I won’t tell Kei your location.”

“I’m hours away by train, somewhere safe. I’ve made a new friend, he’s a little loud sometimes but he really cares for us and has helped me settle my new life here.”

“I’d like to say I’m happy for you Tadashi but if you’re hurting so much over Kei you should call him.”

“I absolutely won’t call him!”

“So stubborn.”

“I’m sorry Suga-San I have to go now.”

“Take care Tadashi and please call again.”

_Oh Tadashi what have you gotten yourself into, my poor boy._

* * *

“Tsukishima here.”

“Kei Tadashi just called me.”

“Suga-San? Wait did you just say Tadashi called you? Where is he?”

“Yes I don’t know where he is he refused to tell me but Kei listen to me he still loves you and misses you everyday.”

Kei tries his hardest to hold himself together but the tears fall.

“Then why, why did he leave?! Shit.” Sniffling Kei digs around in his pocket for a tissue to blow his nose.

“The reasons are a bit complicated.”

“He told you why he left?!”

“Please calm down Kei.”

“Tell me Suga-San, why, why did Tadashi leave me? Especially if he says he loves and misses me.”

“Baby.”

“I’m sorry what was that?”

“Tadashi said it was unplanned but he’s having a baby.”

“He cheated on me?”

“I don’t know the details, according to him he'll be raising the little girl alone after she’s born.”

“He could have stayed!”

“Apparently you hate children so that’s why he ran away without a word.”

“I.. well I don’t particularly like children but Tadashi's would be different!”

“I’m so glad you said that. Now I don’t know where he is but I do have the number he called me from. I’ll give it to you and you can decide if you want to call him or what from there.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry Tadashi Suga mama only wants what's best for his babies.


End file.
